As of yesterday, I’m unemployed. I was enjoying some vacation time from the Saturdays I had worked, as well as days they owed me from last year, but I had also taken almost the entirety of November as vacation time. Unfortunately, the guy whose medical leave I was covering has returned to work (technically he will return on Monday, but administratively he’s back). That means that my contract has ended, and I’ll have to call HR and ensure that my scheduled vacation time will show up as extra money in my last paycheck.

Worse yet, I have returned to the dreadful wasteland of not knowing when I’ll get recalled to work. I may get woken up at eight in the morning any given day (even on a Saturday), and told to show up at the office a couple of hours later. And it’s a really bad time for me to return to work, because next month, the project to replace every goddamn computer in the hospital complex starts, and my boss had already informed me that he intended to involve me.

In case you haven’t been following my posts, I’ve dealt with stress-induced medical issues, including arrhythmia, as well as an episode that sent me to the ER and got me diagnosed with a complex migraine, likely a hemiplegic migraine, although I suspect it may have been a small stroke: the issues with my vision, the main symptom for which they diagnosed me with a migraine, ended up being related to a detached vitreous gel that a couple of weeks later developed into a torn retina; I had to hurry to the ER and get patched up with a laser (and my vision has ended up permanently fucked up from that episode).

Honestly, I don’t think I’m suited for full-time work. I can work tirelessly at my own stuff, and do so, sometimes even at night until I can’t think anymore, but working at an office, surrounded by human beings, is far too much for an autistic nutcase like me. Likely, though, any other job that would pay similarly would be far worse for me; I already tried to work in the private sector, more often than not for free, and I was a prime candidate to be let go or not hired because someone in charge considered me weird. Even had a direct boss argue with his superior that I was doing great technical work, only for that superior to let me go because I wouldn’t “fit in.”

Anyway, I’m busy with my programming project, but I also want to get my mind off this sudden change, so I’ll likely spend the whole afternoon in the beautiful city of Donostia, walking around or sitting at some outside table to read manga.

Being an adult sucks so much. Don’t ever do it, kids.