Once William’s triceratops friend was seen for the last time, William Griffin’s mood plummeted. His neighbor Claire Javernick moved away days later. Riddled with guilt and despair, the texts that William produced during this stage up to his death have remained a source of discussion for years.
I met Lorenzo a long, long time ago.
I bet he is somewhere in the sky.
When he died I put him in the earth,
Buried him in a hole you can’t see.I met Claire last night.
She was sixteen and she was blind,
She was blind but she could see.
The way she looked at me with those greys,
I was sent straight to hell.Her house has been empty since then.
‘Hell Yeah’ by William Griffin
She took my warmth with her.
She went down to hell to stay.
She had said it once but said it again:
“Hell yeah.”
The shadows, the black and the grey
Ran down her face so dreadfully.
Every time I looked I saw her tears.
She never agreed to stay the night.Lorenzo, a giant skeleton,
A living graveyard for the dead.
A door in his throat
Was leading right to hell,
Where there are worms and dinosaurs.Claire, you can’t escape your fate.
Claire, the sixteen years old girl
With no idea how to read or write.
You’re so small, but in your heart
You’re a fourteen years old slut.I like boys, I like boys,
‘Worms and Dinosaurs’ by William Griffin
I like boys, I like boys,
I like boys, I like boys,
I like boys, I like boys,
I like boys, I like boys,
I like boys, I like boys,
I like boys, I like boys,
I like boys, I like boys.
Lorenzo killed the dinosaurs,
And he’s about to kill your ass
For snorting his drool
Like I’ve seen you do.He’s been hungry for a while now,
That triceratops.Fuck you, don’t open the door.
You’ll never find him there,
And you don’t want to see what’s behind.A door is there.
You’ve got to step inside,
And pray that I’m wrong.“I love you, Claire,” I’d say.
“I’m so glad that we were born!”
And you would say, “I love you too, Billy.
What are we going to do today?”
“I think we’ll walk the stairs
Up to the last, then maybe
Go for a swim!”We can’t stop! We can’t stop!
Never stare at the door, I said.
‘Lorenzo the Kinslayer’ by William Griffin
Never stare at the door
When it opens.
Lorenzo was the dino from out of town
‘Keep Your Last Name’ by William Griffin
That everybody knew for years.
Lorenzo was the dino from out of town,
And he was gonna stay a while.
He didn’t even have a last name.
He would have taken Claire’s.
They made a deal
To see what they were made of.
They ate, they drank and they made love
In good times and in bad.
Lorenzo was the dino from out of town
That everybody knew for years.
Lorenzo was the dino from out of town
And he was gonna stay a while.
Claire was the girl from this town,
The girl from this town,
The girl from this town.
She was supposed to stay.
Claire,
‘In Your Fingertips’ by William Griffin
You couldn’t write a thing,
Nor read for that matter,
But you must have known
Just by the way my smile felt
In your fingertips
That my love for you was real.
All I could do was walk the streets
And keep you near.
I loved you, Claire,
But now you’re gone.
Lorenzo died then, in the night.
I was sleeping when he passed away.
I was nowhere near that place, I swear,
Where they said he died.
He was singing a lullaby to me.
I heard beauty in his voice.I wish I could hear his voice again,
And both our voices would sing together.
I wish it was a real voice that I was hearing,
Instead of a track of white noise.I wish this voice I hear was him,
Not his part in a symphony orchestra,
That way a dinosaur’s voice breaks,
But only for a second.Just like the choir song
‘Joy to the World’ from ‘A Charlie Brown Christmas’,
I wish I could be hearing and feeling the joy
And singing songs.And I would love to sing a song
‘I Know I Can Sing’ by William Griffin
About the day that I kissed her.
Like a cool breeze on a summer’s day,
It would keep on going on.
Lorenzo was a friend of mine.
We didn’t always see eye to eye,
But he was a pretty good friend to me.Until one day that I noticed
That he’d given me his voice
And now his voice is in my head,
Whispering things about stuff he said
And about some things he did.So maybe I’m doing the same thing.
Maybe I’m doing something bad,
But it feels so good to be the one
Who caused it all to go wrong.Lorenzo betrayed me by fucking my girl.
‘A Debt’ by William Griffin
Claire, you were sweet as apple pie.
You felt all alone and I couldn’t bear to see
That you never opened your eyes.
Lorenzo was the friend of a girl
Who makes me feel bad,
‘Cause she went and turned her back.
His trunk was like his throat,
Where you could see inside
A portal to hell.And she thought he was pretty cute,
‘A Friend Made Me Grow’ by William Griffin
And back then I believed I was in love,
I embraced a kind of craziness.
I guess I owe it to Lorenzo,
Who held a mirror towards me,
And in there I saw a fool.
It was a friend that made me grow.
Lorenzo was a big ol’ triceratops,
A sort of prehistoric water buffalo,
With a God-awful nightmare in his throat.
He went on a dangerous journey to hell,
To let the devil back into our town.So I stabbed the son of a bitch in the neck.
His blood squirted all over the damn place.
I buried the motherfucking bastard.
I thought about Claire, but…But why should I worry about that bitch?
She thinks she can fuck with triceratopses.
She knew she would have been sorry in the end.
I ain’t putting up with it no more.Lorenzo didn’t forgive her.
He killed her too, poor Claire,
Or at least I imagined he did
To forget how she stared at me then.Lorenzo fell in love with her too.
Claire smiled at him so beautifully.
She was a looker, could have caused a war.
To have someone like that to call my wife.Forget the girl, forget the snake.
‘You Were the Reason for All of This’ by William Griffin
I put him in a tomb,
And when the pressure gets too hard,
I’ll open it and let the big bastard out again.
The words on the page,
They are just too plain.
I can’t read.
I have no clue what anything means.The man in the sky has sent me a plan
To prove I am insane,
And I can hear the crash of the sky falling down,
Crushing me into ashes.I can hear the wail of the cries,
But why can I not hear the child of divine creation
Playing with that strange man
Behind the gate?I don’t have the ears to hear his laugh.
‘Let Me In’ by William Griffin
The gate is mine now,
And I don’t know where the hell I am going.
Your name was Lorenzo,
And it’s time to resurrect.When I’m awake, I’m in hell.
When I’m asleep, I’m in hell.Your name was Lorenzo.
You were waiting for a token
To open the portal.When my mother is crying,
I am smiling, don’t you know?
My mother cries and my father smiles.
My mother cries and my father smiles.
My mother cries and my father smiles.
My mother cries and my father smiles.How could he had the responsibility
To guard the portal to hell
With a name like Lorenzo?And in your black hole,
Do you hear the angels’ chorus?When I am asleep, I’m in hell.
When I’m awake, I’m in hell.Your name was Lorenzo.
‘Lazarus’ by William Griffin
No angel nor animal will help you.
What are you waiting for?
The bones in his body
‘Just a Skeleton’ by William Griffin
Showed through his eyes.
In his throat there was a portal to hell,
But the portal to hell inside his throat
Stopped him from being a giant.
Now he lies as a skeleton
On my pillow.
I could sing a lullaby to a dinosaur.
I could sing a lullaby to the triceratops
With the portal to hell in his throat.
I could sing a lullaby to my sixteen years old neighbor,
Who used to be there,
And couldn’t read nor write.Come on my way to play basketball
With the ancient astronauts.
Come on my way to play baseball
With the dinosaurs.
Come on my way to play hockey
With the cyclops.
Come on my way to see the triceratops
With the portal to hell in his throat.You can kiss my hairy, hairy ass
‘Lullabies for the Undeserving World’ by William Griffin
While I’m playing with the dinosaurs.
I’ll kiss yours,
So kiss mine, if you want to.
All I remember of you is you’d look into my eyes
And you’d ask what I wanted,
And I’d say, “I want to go to heaven.”
You were the Devil’s child,
Filled with this hatred for me.
I could feel it, it was no secret,
I could see it in your eyes and in your rage,
With your tears as well as your laughter.
I could see you were truly evil.
The blood running down the side of your beak,
Your hands full of death. Your wrath was terror.
You took my innocence, you stole my childhood.
You contaminated my heart.But you are no longer here,
‘Lorenzo Is No More’ by William Griffin
And I’ll see you in hell.
Everybody hates, yeah, everybody hates.
Except for some idiots, yeah, everybody hates.
They hate the heroes, yeah, everybody hates.
Some say “Hate the rich,” yeah, everybody hates.
Sugar and spice and everything nice, yeah, everybody hates.
They hate the geeks, yeah, everybody hates.
All the old people, yeah, everybody hates.
All the kids, yeah, everybody hates.
I hate the whole fucking thing.The way you must be feeling, baby,
Your daddy was gone too soon,
But I do believe in hell, I do.
In my dreams He tells me all about it.
I hear the angels, how they shout,
And the babies keep on crying,
And the sun is sinking.Well, I know I’m a little weird, yeah,
‘Everybody Hates’ by William Griffin
But I’m harmless, yeah,
I harbor the beginning of the end,
And I’m not gonna last very long.
I am seventeen years old.
‘I Hope I Die Soon’ by William Griffin
I am an animal and a monster.
I live in a mirror,
And that’s my home.
I will hunt you down
And make you suffer.
I’ll tear your heart apart
And then eat it.
Lorenzo could have stayed
A creature of the Earth,
But the fiery heart that burned within him
Could not be so restrained.
He was twisted like a prison cell,
And tortured by the fears in his head.
He hid in his shell so no one could see
His pain and torment.
He was not meant to be like this,
He was meant to be left alone.
He needed help, but no one could help him;
Who knows how to treat a goddamned dinosaur.
They were all supposed to be dead.There’s no hope, there’s no hope.
‘Inside His Shell’ by William Griffin
There’s no hope, there’s no hope.
There’s no hope, there’s no hope.
In his secret diary, Lorenzo wrote,
“Griffin, my body is a fortress of reason.”From the sky full of stars above,
A silver rain pours inside,
Though I’m just seventeen.
Claire’s gone, she’s gone too.It’s so strange, how could he have
‘Why Haven’t I Died yet?’ by William Griffin
Left a girl who wasn’t finished?
I could have told him, but he’d never listened.
Maybe he’ll listen when I’m finished.
I am locked inside my mind.
I am losing the flow of my thoughts,
And I need someone to save me.I was taken to a doctor but he wouldn’t help me.
I need a scientist, a shaman or a preacher.
Tell me how to escape this.
Alone and dumb, lying alone in the night.I am crying and I am crying and I am shaking inside.
I am trembling, I am shaking and I can’t hide my hate.
I am crying, crying, crying, crying and I can’t hide my hate.
I can’t escape this!Well, yes I can!
‘Panic! Panic! Panic!’ by William Griffin
I’m gonna die anyway.
I’m gonna die anyway.
I’m gonna die anyway.
I am ill, this I know;
My heart is sick and my head rotten.
I’m here on earth today
‘Cause it is Saturday,
And all of a sudden I see it clear:
I see that it is too late.All of the things I had wanted to do
Would not have made a difference.
Had them once and never again.
I am sick of wanting it to be different.I’d die to be just where I am,
But in a land of plenty.
There is no fear in this journey.I would die to be like Lorenzo.
‘Extinct Like You’ by William Griffin
At least I think I would.
Everyone must die,
So why don’t I follow him?
I can’t die a virgin.
I wish I had a pistol;
I’d shoot myself
And die a martyr.I’m in love with this girl.
Someday she will look at me
The same as I look at her.I know that my time’s up
And that I’ll die a virgin,
Just like God.Someday I’ll meet her,
But it won’t be today.
I hope that she’s standing
In a black and white photo
With her hand on her chest,
Waiting to hear me whisper,
“I love you.”Someday I’ll marry her
And we’ll be together,
And when we’re old
And frail and lonely,
We’ll talk and she’ll say,
“Tell me again.”“I love you, I love you,
I love you, I love you,
I love you, I love you.”But I didn’t love her enough.
‘Die a Virgin’ by William Griffin
I’ll die a virgin.
I know where hell’s fire burns,
In a place where everyone goes.
I know the gates are closed,
But who knows for how long.I feel like hell’s on the inside.
Why was I born to suffer this?
Was I spat here to stand this pain?I know the path is long,
And that I will die someday.
Hell is all around,
‘Cause I’m stuck, trapped
In a hell with no escape.Here’s to Lorenzo, who was a triceratops
‘Where Hell’s Fire Burns’ by William Griffin
With a hell portal in his throat.
Hear it on the hilltops of the east,
Those wondrous portals
Opening to a crystal labyrinth
Inside my head.What then goes into the nothing?
I’ll give you the portals.
They open to a jumbled rose field.
You tell me if it is the cloud of Eden.A great fiery pillar
‘Firefly Bumblebee by William Griffin
Going nowhere and coming from nowhere.
Lorenzo and Claire with Him
As I swing the peephole closed.
Heaven is now on the move.
Lorenzo sat on the hill of flame
And opened the door to hell.
Two souls escaped with wings of fire,
Both headed out of here.Someday I’ll make it to that far shore
Where eagles fly on the smell of earth.
I’ll sit and rest in my blue suit.
The memories will blur and fade to the wind.Lorenzo will sit with his eyes upon me
On the grass ignited with flames,
And as I shove my hand down my throat,
I’ll recall the day he took you from me.I yearn for my soul to burn,
‘Rest in My Blue Suit’ by William Griffin
And your spirit to land upon my hand,
As I wait in the dark.
Will swallowed a cancer.
His asshole was full of pythons.
He swallowed an earthquake,
And the stars fell to their knees.
He swallowed a goddamn volcano,
And threw up an avalanche.
He swallowed it all
And it almost choked him to death.In his throat, a dark-red portal to a land
Where damned souls roam free.
Stretching forever, a bridge through time
To the endless void of the Abyss.In this vast and desolate land of hungry monsters,
He will face His executioner.
Alone Will stands, strapped to a rock.
A vengeful god shoots him with a flamethrower
And burns him alive.He’s burning like a chicken.
His flesh is sizzling.
Burnt wood, burning steak.
He dies.
Hell burns, hell’s walls collapse.
He dies again,
Once, twice, thrice.He dies.
‘William Griffin’s Death Song’ by William Griffin
It’s over.
He’s dead.
Lorenzo was a triceratops
With a portal to hell inside his throat.
Claire was a self-righteous fifteen years old
That has never been to school.
She did not want to love me,
Although I did the best I could.I am a young man, but my fate
Is clear as a blackboard.
Lorenzo was a triceratops
With a portal to hell inside his throat.
I would have been the size of a dinosaur
When I grew up.
I cannot change my past,
Don’t want to heave these mistakes.And my final words,
Written before my tragic death,
Are:Well, shit.
‘Well, Shit’ by William Griffin
I’m seventeen,
And I loved her,
So there’s that.
William got no answer from Claire Javernick before he died. Will therefore died a miserable teenage boy. He had a beautiful mom, a wonderful sister, and a step-father who didn’t love him as much as he should have. But in the end William lost his two friends.
Before Claire Javernick died in a car crash on December 14, 2019, she wrote a poem about William, which she never titled.
I was walking in the snow
With a boy named William.
He was my neighbor in our street.
He was born on the 6th of May.
One night he called me crying.
He was only fourteen years old.I felt scared,
And never so alone.
I looked at the sky for an answer.
His sister took away his songs.
I’ll never forget him,
And I’ll never forget him,
And I’ll never forget him.
Claire also wrote about some tree which is located in a forest in Vermont.
William Griffin died on April 6, 2009. His story remains unfinished, and his lyrics continue to be discussed on William Griffin’s official website, which is run by his sister.
It was a dark night for Triceratops. Nobody around him lightened the mood. As he walked, he found himself surrounded by horrible birds, alive and dead. He was worried about finding a place to sleep, because all the good spots were taken. He also needed to eat if only to fill an emptiness in his throat that he hadn’t felt before.
“Well, what am I to do?” Lorenzo asked for input to the sky.
He disliked when the guy in the sky remained silent. For some reason He thought that He could get away with that.
But then God said to him, “Look at your right side.”
The triceratops looked at his right flank, which had never seemed so red. A warmth was rising from his legs. He felt he was going crazy.
The next thing he knew, he was lying on his side in a field of sleeping sheep, all of them facing the sky and snoring. Everything was getting redder and redder. Then the sound of snoring stopped and even the wind got quiet.
Lorenzo looked around the field until he spotted some people with their bodies covered in red. They were walking towards the group of sleeping sheep, and one of the people was staring at the triceratops. The next thing Lorenzo knew, he was flying along with the group of red men. He soared above the rolling hills, but he wasn’t enjoying it, because he thought he was going to die.
“That’s great,” he thought. “All this redness and pain, just to die by getting covered in sheep crap.”
The more he thought about dying, the more it scared him, because he was quite sure that he would end up in hell. The triceratops cried a little.
Some of the sheep got up and looked at the triceratops and his red eyes, and beautiful red hair, and beautiful red skin.
The triceratops continued flying around and around and around, until he heard the sound of a human voice. It sounded a little like his friend William Griffin, but different. Lorenzo landed on a large rock. The sheep had all gathered around a human being, and they were staring with sad, worried faces.
Lorenzo walked over to the sheep. He wanted to say something, but his throat hurt so bad that he could barely speak, and he knew that if he did speak, it would sound as if he were dying.
Then the human being said, “I have been given the gift of eternal life. I have been given the gift of seeing and experiencing the world. I have been given the gift of being surrounded by living things that love me and care about me.”
The human being lay down, and the sheep started running around him. Then he said, “I was a human once, until I was judged and separated from God, and because I was considered unworthy, I was sent to be in the place of living things, and I am to be around them to teach them about God, and how to become more like God, and live a godly life. And I am to help them find their way back home, back to God. And when they die, they are not supposed to become dead, so that there is no fear of death. They are supposed to be pure and innocent, so that they can face God without fear of condemnation.”
The triceratops became concerned, and he said, “I am a triceratops, and I am innocent and pure, and I have never lived among sheep.” He gave it more thought. “I can understand being around sheep, but living among them? I am not innocent and pure like them, so I will be judged, condemned and sent to hell. How could they be pure and innocent if they are like me?”
And then he remembered what he knew about God, and he felt sorry for the people that they will judge and condemn, because they will have no one to help them when they die. And he thought about his friend, who died young, and who was, like him, judged and condemned and sent to hell. And he thought about his loved one, who can’t read nor write, who is stuck with animals, because no one has ever shown her that she is important to God. And he remembered the times that he would try to tell his friend William Griffin what he was told to teach, and how Lorenzo himself never understood a single thing that he was told to teach. And he realized that no matter what, he had a choice, and that this would never happen again.
“I will choose to love God. I will choose to live among sheep. I will choose to be in the place of living things. And I will choose to help them know God and to live a godly life, and if I fail and I go to hell, I have no problem with that, because I have chosen to love God and live among sheep. And because of the choice I have made, I will never be sent to hell, and because of the choice I have made, I will know eternal life, because I have chosen to love God, and to live among sheep. And because of the choice I have made, I am no longer the same person I was when I started.”
The triceratops started walking away from the group of sheep, and he told himself that he would choose to love God and live among sheep, and he would help them find their way back home, and he would make a place for himself where he would always be with the sheep. And he told himself that when he died, he would be purified, because he had chosen to love God, and he would be given the gift of being around sheep, and he would be purified, because he had chosen to live among sheep.
The group of sheep that had started walking with Triceratops followed him as he made his way back to the place where he and his friend, who had died, had stayed. And the place where he and his friend had stayed was back in the world of the living, the world of beauty and darkness, where there is light and dark, sunshine and shadow.
THE END
The Domains of the Emperor Owl 